Why Do We Experience Discontentedness? Understanding Its Cause and Elimination
- David Roylance
- 6 days ago
- 15 min read
Updated: 2 hours ago
Every human being who is unEnlightened experiences discontentedness.
At times, the mind experiences happiness, excitement, thrill, elation, and euphoria. At other times, it experiences sadness, anger, frustration, fear, stress, loneliness, or boredom. The mind continually moves among different feelings, unable to remain permanently peaceful, calm, serene, and content with joy.
In The Teachings of The Buddha, this unstable condition of the unEnlightened mind is described by the Pāli word dukkha.
Why does this happen?
The Buddha discovered that the problem is not merely the changing world around us. The problem is the way the unEnlightened mind relates to that changing world.
The mind craves, desires, attaches, expects, grasps, holds, and clings. It wants people, possessions, relationships, situations, feelings, and experiences to remain as the mind prefers. But everything in the world is impermanent. When the mind attempts to obtain permanence from impermanent conditions, it causes itself to experience discontentedness.
The good news is that discontentedness does not need to remain in the mind permanently. Because the mind causes its own discontentedness through craving, desire, and attachment, the mind can also be trained to eliminate these causes.
The Teachings of The Buddha provide a life practice leading to a mind that is permanently peaceful, calm, serene, and content with joy.
Summary
Dukkha in Buddhism describes the discontentedness experienced by the unEnlightened mind. The Pāli word dukkha is commonly translated as “suffering,” but discontentedness more fully describes the unstable condition of the unEnlightened mind.
Discontentedness arises because the mind craves, desires, and attaches to impermanent people, objects, feelings, and circumstances. By eliminating craving through The Eight Fold Path, a Practitioner can develop a mind that is peaceful, calm, serene, and content with joy—permanently.
Table of Contents
What Is Discontentedness?
Discontentedness describes the condition of the mind when it is unsatisfied, displeased, uncalm, unpeaceful, shaken, unsteady, or unstable.
It is not limited to intense pain or significant emotional distress. Discontentedness can include the slightest irritation, annoyance, discomfort, or dissatisfaction. It can arise from physical pain, emotional pain, a displeasing sight, an unpleasant sound, an undesirable odor, a disagreeable flavor, an uncomfortable physical sensation, or a thought that the mind does not like.
But discontentedness is not limited to painful experiences.
The Buddha describes three categories of feelings experienced by the unEnlightened mind:
Pleasant feelings, such as happiness, excitement, elation, thrill, exhilaration, and euphoria.
Painful feelings, such as sadness, anger, frustration, irritation, annoyance, guilt, shame, fear, stress, and anxiety.
Feelings that are neither painful nor pleasant, such as boredom, loneliness, shyness, discomfort, dissatisfaction, or feeling displeased.
Discontentedness is the unstable condition of the mind as it moves among these conditioned feelings. The feelings arise because of conditions, remain temporarily, and then cease to exist.
What Does Dukkha Mean in Buddhism?
The Pāli word dukkha is commonly translated into English as “suffering.” However, the word suffering does not clearly communicate the full range of experiences described in The Teachings of The Buddha.
The word suffering generally causes people to think only about physical pain, emotional pain, tragedy, or significant hardship. It does not ordinarily describe happiness, excitement, boredom, dissatisfaction, or the instability of a mind that continually moves among pleasant and unpleasant experiences.
For this reason, discontentedness provides a more complete explanation of dukkha.
Discontentedness includes every condition in which the mind is not residing permanently peaceful, calm, serene, and content with joy. It includes painful experiences, but it also includes the mind’s pursuit of temporary pleasant feelings and its dissatisfaction when nothing especially pleasant or painful is occurring.
The Universal Truth of Discontentedness explains how the unEnlightened mind bases its internal feelings on external and internal conditions that are constantly changing. As those conditions change, the feelings produced by those conditions change as well.
Throughout this article, the words discontent, discontented, and discontentedness will be used to communicate the fuller meaning of dukkha.
Discontentedness is one of The Three Universal Truths taught by The Buddha:
Discontentedness
These three Teachings help a Practitioner understand the changing world, the discontented condition of the unEnlightened mind, and the absence of a permanent self.
What Causes Discontentedness?
The cause of discontentedness is craving, desire, or attachment. Craving is also identified as one of The Three Poisons that keep the mind in the unEnlightened state.
A craving, desire, or attachment is a mental longing for something with a strong eagerness.
It is the mind pulling towards an object of its affection and believing that obtaining, keeping, controlling, or changing that object will produce inner satisfaction.
The object could be:
A possession
A relationship
Wealth
Recognition
Fame
A job title
A particular outcome
Another person’s agreement
Happiness
Perfection
A belief or opinion
A past experience
A future expectation
The object itself is not the craving. The craving is how the mind relates to the object. It is the mind pulling towards the object.
A person can have possessions, relationships, responsibilities, interests, goals, and objectives without mentally depending on those things to create lasting inner fulfillment. The difficulty begins when the mind pulls towards them with a strong eagerness and believes that they must be obtained, controlled, or maintained for the mind to be content.
Because the object and the conditions surrounding it are impermanent, the mind will eventually encounter change. When the experience does not match the mind’s craving or expectation, the mind becomes discontent.
The Four Noble Truths: The Problem, Cause, Elimination, and Path
The Four Noble Truths establish the proper understanding, or Right View, needed to eliminate discontentedness.
They can be summarized as follows:
The First Noble Truth
Everyone that is unEnlightened will experience discontentedness.
The unEnlightened mind experiences pleasant feelings, painful feelings, and feelings that are neither painful nor pleasant. It moves repeatedly among these experiences because its feelings are conditioned by impermanent circumstances.
When the mind is experiencing discontentedness, it is not calm and is therefore unable to make wise decisions that would lead to wholesome results—that is, wholesome Kamma.
The Second Noble Truth
Discontentedness is caused by our own cravings, desires, and attachments because the mind wants everything to be permanent when everything in the world is impermanent.
The mind experiences discontentedness due to its craving for permanence while living in an impermanent world.
The Third Noble Truth
The elimination of discontentedness is possible by eliminating cravings/desires/attachments.
The mind does not need to eliminate every possession, relationship, or responsibility. It needs to eliminate the mental longing, grasping, holding, and clinging directed towards these impermanent objects.
The Fourth Noble Truth
The path to eliminating discontentedness is The Eight Fold Path.
The Four Noble Truths explain the problem, identify its cause, confirm that the problem can be eliminated, and provide The Path leading to its complete elimination.
The Buddha taught:
"Therefore, Monks, an effort should be made to understand: This is discontentedness.
An effort should be made to understand: This is the cause of discontentedness.
An effort should be made to understand: This is the elimination of discontentedness.
An effort should be made to understand: This is the way leading to the elimination of discontentedness."
(Reference: SN 56.1)
Why Are Pleasant Feelings Part of Discontentedness?
Most people understand why sadness, anger, anxiety, and fear are discontented feelings. It can initially be more challenging to understand why happiness, excitement, and pleasurable feelings are also included in discontentedness.
Pleasant feelings are not permanent.
When the mind experiences something agreeable, it may become happy, excited, or elated. But because the condition producing that feeling is impermanent, the pleasant feeling eventually changes and ceases to exist.
The mind can then experience painful feelings because it wants the pleasant experience to continue. Or the mind may become bored, lonely, unsatisfied, or displeased because it is no longer receiving the pleasant feelings it was seeking.
The unEnlightened mind then looks for another condition that it hopes will produce happiness.
It may seek another possession, relationship, achievement, experience, form of entertainment, meal, vacation, promotion, or compliment. The mind receives temporary pleasant feelings and then begins searching for the next source of satisfaction.
This creates a repeating cycle:
The mind craves a pleasant experience, receives temporary pleasant feelings, loses those feelings because of impermanence, experiences dissatisfaction, and then develops another craving.
The problem is not that a pleasant experience occurred. The problem is that the mind attached its inner contentedness to an impermanent condition.
As long as the mind depends on changing conditions for inner fulfillment, it cannot remain permanently peaceful and content.
The Enlightened mind experiences unconditioned happiness; no external condition needs to be met for happiness to be experienced.
Impermanence and Discontentedness
Everything in the world is constantly changing.
Possessions change. Relationships change. The body changes. Thoughts, ideas, feelings, and states of mind change. Circumstances change. All conditioned feelings arise, remain temporarily, and cease to exist.
The mind may want a possession to last permanently, a relationship to remain exactly the same, another person always to agree, or an enjoyable experience never to end. But these expectations are inconsistent with The Universal Truth of Impermanence.
Discontentedness does not arise merely because something changed. Change is the natural condition of the world.
Discontentedness arises because the mind was craving, desiring, or attaching to a particular outcome. The mind wanted an impermanent condition to remain permanent.
The more tightly the mind holds, the more shaken it becomes when change occurs.
A Practitioner therefore needs to learn, reflect on (i.e. independently verify), and observe impermanence. This acquired wisdom helps the mind stop demanding permanence from people, possessions, relationships, feelings, and situations that cannot provide it.
The Endless Pursuit of Wants
The unEnlightened mind continually develops new wants.
A child may believe that obtaining a bicycle will produce happiness. Once the bicycle is obtained, the mind experiences pleasant feelings for a period of time. Eventually, those feelings fade and the mind develops another desire.
Later, the mind may want a motorcycle, an automobile, and then a luxury automobile.
The specific object changes, but the activity of the mind remains the same. The mind pursues an impermanent condition, experiences temporary pleasant feelings, and then develops another craving when those feelings cease.
The mind may spend an entire lifetime pursuing possessions, relationships, wealth, fame, occupations, achievements, pleasures, and recognition without ever reaching permanent contentedness.
This does not mean that a person cannot use transportation, pursue a career, maintain relationships, or work towards beneficial goals. The difference is found within the mind.
A need is something required or helpful for sustaining life. A craving is mental longing with a strong eagerness.
A Practitioner can meet the needs of life and pursue healthy interests, goals, and objectives while training the mind not to depend on them for lasting inner fulfillment.
The Problem Is Within the Mind
The unEnlightened mind commonly believes that discontentedness is caused by someone or something outside itself.
The mind may think:
“That person made me angry.”
“This situation caused my frustration.”
“I cannot be peaceful unless this person changes.”
“I will be content when everything happens as I expect.”
“I need everyone to understand or agree with me.”
But it is impossible to train the entire world to behave according to our wants and expectations.
People will not always agree with us. Relationships and situations will change. Possessions will become damaged, lost, or unavailable. The body will age. Plans will not always produce the expected results.
Attempting to control the entire world is an impossible task.
The problem experienced by the unEnlightened mind is not the outside world. The problem is the inner world. It is the mind’s craving, attachment, expectation, and resistance towards what occurs.
You cannot control the minds and decisions of everyone else. But you can train your own mind.
When a Practitioner accepts responsibility for the condition of their own mind, the possibility of eliminating discontentedness becomes clear. Because craving within the mind causes discontentedness, eliminating that craving can eliminate the problem.
This is not a Teaching of blame. It is a Teaching of personal responsibility and freedom. By understanding how the mind functions, a Practitioner can apply the solution and gradually eliminate the cause of discontentedness.
The Eight Fold Path: The Way Leading to Elimination
Understanding the cause of discontentedness is necessary, but intellectual understanding alone will not purify the mind.
A Practitioner needs to develop a life practice.
The Eight Fold Path consists of:
Right View
Right Intention
Right Speech
Right Action
Right Livelihood
Right Effort
Right Mindfulness
Right Concentration
These eight factors are organized into three areas of training:
Wisdom: Right View and Right Intention
Moral Conduct: Right Speech, Right Action, and Right Livelihood
Mental Discipline: Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, and Right Concentration
The entire Eight Fold Path needs to be learned, reflected on (i.e. independently verified), and gradually practiced in daily life. A Practitioner does not need to perfect one factor before beginning another. The Path is developed as an integrated life practice.
Through gradual training, gradual practice, and gradual progress, the mind develops wisdom, improves moral conduct, strengthens mental discipline, and becomes increasingly peaceful and calm.
Eventually, having fully purified the mind, a Practitioner will eliminate 100% of all discontentedness. It will be impossible for the mind to experience any discontentedness when the mind is fully transformed through this training.
Recognizing and Eliminating Craving
Use Discontentedness as a Warning Signal
Discontentedness can become useful when a Practitioner learns to recognize it.
Consider the warning light on the dashboard of an automobile. When the light appears, a wise driver does not merely become angry at the light or ignore it. The driver investigates the cause of the warning and takes steps to resolve the problem.
Discontentedness can be understood in the same way.
When the mind becomes angry, frustrated, irritated, anxious, fearful, lonely, bored, excited, or otherwise unsteady, the discontentedness is a warning that craving, desire, attachment, or expectation exists within the mind.
Instead of blaming another person or the situation, the Practitioner can look inward and ask:
What was the mind wanting?
What did the mind expect to happen?
What was the mind attempting to hold, control, or keep permanent?
What mental longing with a strong eagerness produced this reaction?
An intense episode of discontentedness may involve several cravings. Honest analysis of the mind is therefore an important skill that will need to be developed through practice.
A Practical Process for Eliminating Craving
This is a practical four-step process for eliminating discontentedness:
1. Become Aware and Let Go
When discontentedness arises, become aware of it as early as possible. Ideally, the Practitioner would notice the arising discontentedness as a bodily sensation, which is the early warning system alerting the Practitioner that the mind is about to experience discontentedness.
Apply Right Effort to cut off and let go of the pleasant, painful, or neither-painful-nor-pleasant feeling.
The earlier the mind becomes aware of the arising experience, the less opportunity it has to develop into a longer condition of anger, fear, sadness, anxiety, resentment, or another unwholesome mental state.
2. Investigate the Cause
After the immediate feeling has settled and the mind is calm, look inward and identify the craving, desire, attachment, want, or expectation that caused the mind to become discontent.
Do not focus on what another person said or did. Investigate more deeply what the mind wanted that it did not receive. What craving, desire, attachment, want, or expectation did the mind have that produced the discontentedness?
3. Develop a Plan
Once a craving has been identified, develop a practical plan to weaken and eliminate it.
For example, if the mind becomes distressed whenever a mobile phone is unavailable, the Practitioner could gradually spend periods away from the phone. The purpose is not to declare the phone harmful. The purpose is to train the mind not to hold it so tightly and be capable of experiencing peace and joy without the phone.
The specific plan will depend on the specific craving.
4. Repeat the Process
Apply the same process whenever discontentedness arises:
Become aware.
Cut off and let go.
Investigate the craving.
Develop a plan to eliminate it.
Seek guidance from a Teacher when needed.
Through repeated training, the mind becomes more capable of recognizing craving and letting it go before prolonged discontentedness develops.
Breathing Mindfulness Meditation and Generosity
Breathing Mindfulness Meditation
Breathing Mindfulness Meditation is an essential part of the life practice leading to the elimination of craving.
The practice trains the mind to become aware of thoughts, feelings, ideas, emotions, memories, and expectations without holding on to them. When mental activity arises, the Practitioner learns to observe it, cut it off, let it go, and return attention to the breath.
“Cutting off thoughts” does not mean that a person will never have thoughts. Thoughts, ideas, memories, and plans will continue to occur. The training is to use thoughts when beneficial without becoming attached to them.
But, while in meditation, the Practitioner will need to cut off and let go of any and all thoughts that arise, understanding that thoughts will continue to arise. A Practitioner is training the mind to let go—not to eliminate thoughts. Repeatedly practicing this skill during meditation trains the mind to let go more easily in daily life.
With repeated practice, the mind develops the ability to:
Become aware of mental activity
Recognize unwholesome thoughts and feelings
Let go of past experiences
Let go of future expectations
Eliminate craving, desire, and attachment
Remain in the present moment
Become more peaceful, steady, and concentrated
The elimination of craving and attachment produces contentedness. Meditation provides the training through which the mind becomes more capable of letting go.
As this skill becomes established during meditation, it can be applied in everyday life. When an unwholesome thought, feeling, or emotion arises, the mind becomes aware of it and lets it go rather than feeding, strengthening, and carrying it.
Over time, the mind produces less unwholesome mental activity and develops greater calmness, stability, and contentedness.
Generosity and the Practice of Letting Go
Breathing Mindfulness Meditation provides training to let go within the mind. Generosity provides training to let go through conduct in daily life.
When a person gives, shares, and helps others without attachment, the mind practices releasing its habit of grasping and holding.
However, meditation and generosity are not substitutes for identifying specific cravings. They provide general training that makes letting go easier. The Practitioner will still need to investigate particular incidents of discontentedness, identify the craving involved, and take active steps to eliminate it.
Breathing Mindfulness Meditation, generosity, Right Mindfulness, Right Effort, analysis of the mind, and the complete practice of The Eight Fold Path work together as parts of a well-developed life practice.
Does Eliminating Craving Mean Giving Up Everything?
Eliminating craving does not require a Household Practitioner to abandon every possession, relationship, occupation, interest, or goal.
A craving is not the object itself.
A craving is the mind’s mental longing with a strong eagerness towards the object.
The mind can use a vehicle without thinking that a particular vehicle will provide permanent happiness. It can participate in a relationship without attempting to control the other person or make the relationship permanent. It can pursue a career goal without attaching its inner peace and self-worth to the outcome.
Interests, goals, and objectives can be pursued while walking The Middle Way. The mind can take wise action without craving the result.
The training is to change how the mind relates to impermanent objects—not necessarily to remove every object from one’s life.
Gradual Training and Gradual Progress
The elimination of discontentedness is a gradual process.
A Practitioner should not expect to understand and perfect the entire practice within a few days, weeks, or months. The mind has developed cravings, attachments, expectations, and habits over a long period of time. Training the mind needs dedication, diligence, patience, and repeated practice.
Learn The Teachings.
Reflect on The Teachings.
Practice The Teachings.
Observe the results.
Then continue learning, reflecting, and practicing.
As wisdom develops, the condition of the mind gradually improves. The Practitioner begins to react less and respond more wisely. Cravings weaken. Anger, fear, frustration, stress, loneliness, and other discontent feelings arise less frequently and remain for shorter periods. Eventually, the mind will be completely and permanently peaceful and joyful.
Gradual training and gradual practice produce gradual progress towards a peaceful, calm, serene, and content mind with joy.
Can Discontentedness Be Completely Eliminated?
The purpose of The Teachings of The Buddha is not merely to manage discontentedness temporarily.
The goal is its complete elimination.
When craving, desire, and attachment are completely eliminated, the mind no longer depends on impermanent conditions for its internal state. It becomes “satisfied with what is” and can respond wisely to changing situations without being shaken by them.
Enlightenment is described as a mind that resides permanently peaceful, calm, serene, and content with joy.
This does not mean that the world stops changing. Impermanence continues. Possessions, relationships, situations, and the physical body remain subject to change.
What changes is the mind.
The mind no longer attempts to make impermanent conditions permanent. It no longer bases its inner contentedness on obtaining, controlling, or maintaining those conditions.
Through learning, reflecting, practicing, and acquiring wisdom, the mind is liberated from discontentedness.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is dukkha the same as suffering?
Dukkha is commonly translated as suffering, but discontentedness communicates the Teaching more completely. Suffering tends to suggest only painful experiences, while discontentedness includes pleasant feelings, painful feelings, and feelings that are neither painful nor pleasant.
Why is happiness considered discontentedness?
Conditioned happiness is based on impermanent circumstances. Because those circumstances change, the happiness they produce will also change. When the mind attaches to temporary happiness, it becomes dissatisfied when that feeling ends.
The Enlightened mind experiences unconditioned happiness; no external condition needs to be met for happiness to be experienced.
Do other people cause our discontentedness?
Other people and situations provide conditions in which feelings arise, but the mind’s craving, desire, attachment, or expectation causes it to become discontent. Accepting responsibility for the mind allows a Practitioner to train and change it rather than attempting to control everyone else.
Does eliminating craving mean having no goals?
No. A person can have healthy interests, goals, and objectives. The training is to pursue them without the mental longing and strong eagerness that characterize craving, and without depending on the result for inner fulfillment.
Must a person give up relationships and possessions?
No. The object is not the craving. The craving is the mind’s attachment to the object and its belief that the object will provide lasting contentedness.
How does meditation help eliminate discontentedness?
Breathing Mindfulness Meditation develops awareness of mind and trains the Practitioner to notice thoughts and feelings without attaching to them. Through repeated practice, the mind becomes increasingly skilled at cutting off and letting go of unwholesome mental activity.
What is the path leading to the elimination of discontentedness?
The path is The Eight Fold Path: Right View, Right Intention, Right Speech, Right Action, Right Livelihood, Right Effort, Right Mindfulness, and Right Concentration.
A Permanently Content Mind
The unEnlightened mind searches the impermanent world for permanent satisfaction.
It pursues pleasant feelings, resists painful feelings, and becomes dissatisfied with feelings that are neither painful nor pleasant. It continually craves, desires, expects, grasps, holds, and clings.
But there is another way to live.
A Practitioner can learn to recognize discontentedness, identify its cause, eliminate craving, and train the mind through The Eight Fold Path.
This is not accomplished through belief alone. The Teachings need to be learned, reflected on, and practiced for results to be experienced.
Each experience of discontentedness provides an opportunity to look inward.
What is the mind craving?
What is it attempting to hold?
What does it expect to remain permanent?
Can the mind let it go?
Through gradual training and gradual practice, the mind can become less reactive, less attached, and less discontent. It can develop wisdom, moral conduct, and mental discipline.
The ultimate result is Enlightenment—a mind that is permanently peaceful, calm, serene, and content with joy.
David Roylance is a dedicated Practitioner, Teacher, and published author who has taught The Teachings of The Buddha since 2005. Based in Chiang Mai, Thailand, he guides Household and Ordained Practitioners worldwide through courses, retreats, and special events on The Path to Enlightenment.
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